There is villainous hand-rubbing going on in Dungloe these days, due to the fact that local global megastar Daniel O’Donnell’s new visitor centre has become an entirely unexpected success. Unbelievably, more than 5,000 people have ACTUALLY PAID to see a collection of Daniel’s old tat that he doesn’t use any more, much to the surprise of the crooner himself.
Said the octogenarians’ favourite, “I never expected that people would be that interested in seeing all my memorabilia,” raising serious questions as to why the project went ahead in the first place. One unconfirmed theory is that he is taking advantage of a good-natured local businessman in order to secure for himself a long-term storage facility to house all the stuff that he didn’t think a charity shop would be able to sell.
The centre is currently averaging an astonishing 50-60 visitors a day – a figure never witnessed before in an attraction of its type, or possibly even in an attraction with interesting things in it either.
Among the ‘attractions’ viewable at the centre are:
- things he doesn’t wear anymore, but that he used to wear when he was making a complete show of himself, or getting married
- a video of his best bits (12 minutes long – an achievement in itself)
- a visitor’s book containing the names of foreign nationals from exotic places like the UK and America
- official merchandise for you to buy and take home (€€€€€€€)
Daniel often attends the centre himself to say hello to the people he didn’t expect would be there lining his pockets. As well as increasing the chances of an encounter with the over-70s’ pin-up of choice, this, in theory, opens up the possibility of one lucky visitor happening across a piece of Irish cultural history that would be entirely free to a good home – imagine your friends’ jealousy if you were to return home with a stool fresh from Daniel’s behind that you had fished out of the centre’s Daniel O’Donnell-themed toilets… (we’re not saying he doesn’t flush, but it’s possible)
Although the centre are giving nothing away about plans for the future, we have a sneaking suspicion that a fast-paced ride on the ‘Danielcoaster’ will be available in the near future.