Skippy the Bush Kangaroo to Run for Sinn Féin at Next Election

After earlier reports of a Kangaroo spotted outside the Sinn Féin’s Head Office, a source has told the Dollop that Skippy himself will run for the party at the next election. The lanky marsupial, best known for spotting when people Read more

Donegal Man Giving Mass Up for Lent

A Ballyshannon man has decided that he’ll be giving up going to mass for Lent, effective from next Sunday’s 11am instance. Fifty-three year old Áodh Arásure, who works for Donegal County Council, has decided to drop weekly mass from his Read more

Son Phoning Home From Australia Has Same Conversation with Dad For 17th Consecutive Time

A young Donegal man who has been living in Australia for over two years has had his 17th consecutive, awkward telephone-conversation with his Father. Kevin from Ballybofey moved to Perth in Western Australia in 2012 to work with a mining Read more

Sinn Féin Declare Support for “Maria Cahill Flyover”

Sinn Fein have declared their unconditional support for the naming of a new Dublin flyover as “The Maria Cahill Flyover”. Announcing their support earlier, a party spokesperson said that while they had opposed the naming of the N7 flyover at Read more

Go-Faster Stripes to be Painted on Mass Bus

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in Ecumenical Matters, News, Science and Technology | Leave a comment
Artist's Impression of new go-faster stripes...

All buses that take the Donegal faithful to mass every Sunday are to have go-faster stripes stuck onto them, in an attempt to reduce the overall time it takes to make the five-minute journey to the church from thirty minutes, to five minutes. The stripes, specially commissioned for the weekly mass run, will be made at a top-secret location in one of the disused factories in the Gweedore Industrial Estate. It is believed that the same “magic powder”, used to… Read More

Údarás Na Gaeltachta to Formally Change Name to Údarás Na Quangó

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in History and Politics, News | Leave a comment
Ag obair go cruaidh thíos as an quango...

Údarás Na Gaeltactha has announced that it is formally changing its name to Údarás Na Quangó, after a decision ‘as Gaeilge’ on the matter was made earlier today. The decision or ‘cinneadh’ has the effect of formally recognising its quango status in its name, with the logo expected to follow suit later in the year. “This is completely indifferent news for the Gaeltacht,” said Joe McHugh TD, Minister of State for Gaeltacht Affairs and self-professed English language speaker, explaining that… Read More

Mullaghduff Woman Home from Letterkenny “Much Earlier Than Expected”

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in Lifestyle, News | Leave a comment
Back from Letterkenny over thirty minutes early...

A Mullaghduff woman has arrived home from a shopping trip to Letterkenny much earlier than expected, after getting home today at 15:29. Thirty-Six year-old Gráinne Gásta from Mullaghduff had intended spending the full day in Letterkenny getting a new rig for an upcoming wedding, along with the weekly grocery shop, but by lunchtime she guessed that she may have been thirty minutes ahead of schedule (she had originally planned on being home for 16:00). It is understood that Gráinne saved… Read More

Mysterious Circles Appear Overnight on Main N56 Road

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in Lifestyle, News, Weather and Travel | Leave a comment
Strange markings...

Mysterious circles have appeared overnight on a stretch of the N56 between Letterkenny and Donegal Town, sparking a spate of rumours across Donegal that extra-terrestrial forces are at play. The circles, which are doughnut shaped, appeared on a stretch of road synonymous with foreign looking craft. Many believe the circles are the site of an alien spaceship landing, with local reports that somewhere between the hours of 2am and 5am, “strange engine noises were heard as the two lights of… Read More

Community on High Alert as Neighbour Parks on Other Side of House

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in Crime, Lifestyle, News | Leave a comment
Are you sure it's there?

The village of Meenlaragh is on high alert this evening at unconfirmed reports that one of its residents decided to park their car on the other side of the house. Earlier today, seventy-two year old Charlie Caide grew suspicious when the red 06-DL Toyota, usually parked on the side of his neighbour’s house nearest to his, was in fact parked on the other side of the house completely. “I picked up the phone to the other neighbour straight away” said… Read More

RAM RAIDS – Someone’s Nicking Sheep

Posted by Charlie Pterosaur on in Crime, News | Leave a comment
The ram raids are wile...

A man has been arrested in Derry in connection with swiping sheep off the road and putting them into his pockets, also known as a ram-raid. Three ewes, a ram and ten lambs were taken from the Muckish Gap in a coordinated ram raid on Sunday night. Police from a completely different jurisdiction are investigating the matter and are currently on their hands and knees taking forensics near Droichead na ndeor under the guise of Interpol. We could bring you… Read More

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