The Sun newspaper is set to publish new pictures of massive tits on its front cover, ending rumours that the newspaper had decided to drop a long standing British convention. The cover is expected later this week. The move is being taken to re-launch topless models, from the traditional page three, to their new home on page four. “We want people to work for their thrill by turning that one extra page to reveal a nice big pair of bazumbas,”… Read More
A Donegal man has lashed out at UTV Ireland, blaming the new station for the demise of his favourite Coronation Street character, Deirdre Barlow. 58-year-old Seimí “na Soaps” Boyle, from Lifford, made the comments directly to his television set while watching last night’s episode of the long-running fictional British soap opera. In his comments, Boyle claimed that the arrival of UTV Ireland on the scene had similar timing to the departure of the Deirdre Barlow character from the soap, and… Read More
Head of the IMF Christine Lagarde is in Dublin today to show the exact spot in which the Troika repeatedly fucked Ireland during its five year bailout programme. She is attending a special conference to review Ireland’s experience of the international bailout in which the wealthy interests of European financial institutions got Ireland to bend over and take “a good, hard pounding” in the form of massive cuts to vital services, cement-pouring of toxic debt onto Ireland’s citizens and smug… Read More
In the wake of some very positive publicity for Minister for Health Leo Varadkar, after publicly coming out as a gay man on the Miriam radio show earlier today, the leaders of the main opposition parties have told their straight members to “desperately find something interesting to say about themselves”. Immediately following the programme in which Leo Varadkar spoke of how being a gay man did not define him, the Dollop has it on good authority that the following joint-memo… Read More
The Irish political world was left reeling this morning after it was revealed that Minister for Agriculture, Food, and the Marine, Simon Coveney, is, in fact, straight. It had long been suspected that Coveney, who is married with three children, might be heterosexual, but it was only this morning during a heartfelt interview on National radio that those suspicions were finally confirmed. “I am a straight man,” said Coveney on RTÉ Radio One this morning, “but it’s not something that… Read More
Munster and Ireland rugby player, Paul O’Connell, has embarked on his own version of a two year plan to announce his retirement from the game. The thirty-five-year-old stated earlier that he intends to announce his retirement from the game at some point over the next couple of years, ending rumours that his retirement rumours are premature. “I don’t know for definite at this stage, but I definitely want to follow in the footsteps of the great Brian O’Driscoll, who took… Read More
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